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DOWNRIGHT DANGEROUS - It is alleged, or rather, has become increasingly likely that on the 18th of December 2020, a Christmas party was held at Number 10 Downing Street, during a tier 3 Covid 19 lockdown.
This revelation, supported as it seems by a staff training video, featuring the delightfully honest, Allegra Stratton, has really set the cat amongst the pigeons, with everyone diving for cover. Oh come on, everybody did it. The idea was to control the peasants and ease our mucked up NHS, where we've squandered taxpayer's money on dozens of schemes that have turned out to be more bullshit than Bojo had expected of his cronies. Like the Drax biofuel generating station, based on tree planting as a carbon offset. Who thought up that one? Doesn't anyone know that trees take a lot longer to grow, than this power station consumes them. Then there is Hinkley Point and Sizewell C. Doesn't anybody in the Cabinet know nuclear power is more expensive than renewables, and what about radioactive waste management, that is impossible to say is safe - for hundreds of thousands of years. It never was, and never will be. All the corporations will cease to exist. Leaving the taxpayer footing the bill. So, how come Sizewell and Hinkley Point were even considered, and what about that subsidy, making electricity more expensive for the consumer?
With so much corruption in the Conservative Party, and yes, a Part Time Parliament, it must be said, though they'd rather you didn't, what difference will one little end of year get-together make? It's not the end of the world. Well it was for those victims of the Whuhan virus - oh yes and thanks for that Xi. Those people who died while we lived it up, would have gone anyway. Now how about that consultancy fee and a cushy little job when I retire from politics, using all my old school chums to pave the way for juicy contracts. So, it's only right that I should get a backhander and hush money. As long as it looks legal. It's like pirating films and music, everybody does it. You should see my collection.
Like a serpent slowly rising from a wicker basket in Marrakech, Johnson's trouser snake strikes again. Instead of an Agatha Christie murder mystery, why not a Sex In The City who-dunnit, based on cabinet ministers and civil servant pregnancies. A sort of 'Oh No Minister.'
The world loves a good spoof. We've had Top Gun as Hot Shots, and James Bond as Austin Powers. Very funny by the way. It must be time for a script by 'Shagatha Christie.' This would be the tale of a sex addict that finds his liberal policies about the opposite sex, gets him elected the pink Prime Minister and free love, no matter how awful his policies. Such as compulsory condom wearing in cabinet meetings, parliament and all civil servant administrations, prevention being better than cure, taking the right to procreate away. To include tallywhacker inspections, by way of passports.
His bedromp antics score highly. 'Fifty Shades of Pink,' and virtual production line of children, that Elon Musk would be proud of. And some overriding threat to Britain's security being the theme of each adventure. Like a nuclear power station up the Thames getting the go-ahead, with Moscow's plot to build in a leak in a faulty reactor, to be able to contaminate the capital with dirty radiation, disguised as a core meltdown - to sterilize all men - and render city dwellers impotent, unless, a massive sum of money is paid.
Every time there is an uprising in the Commons, or local elections that could be lost, Shagadelia, a FemBot, might be deployed to sabotage the adversary under the covers, bed the arch rival and undermine their evil plan.
The plots could extend to Putin and Xi, or even Modi in spoof form, where a powerful mojo underpins their beliefs. The Temple of Boom, Boom. The Last Christmas Party.
The possibilities are endless.
BOJO'S BED WETTING
Somehow, despite many scandals of a sexual nature, Boris has managed to cling onto Clowning Street, the debt centre of town. In the media, it is said, presumably allegedly, that he has fathered many children outside of wedlock, but nobody knows how many sexataries may have been involved.
BRITAIN GOT ANOTHER BUM DEAL - In electing a clown as Prime Minister, UK voters made one of the biggest mistakes in British history. Brexit was and is a disaster, costing pensioners an absolute fortune, as real world inflation halved the value of their savings, with timber, copper and other commodities doubling in price. Then there is the energy crises and nuclear power, with food prices rising. We feel sure that Dr Hannibal Lecter would like to have his old friend for dinner. It might be that some Conservative Party members might also want to join in the feast.
THE CIRCUS -MARCH 2020
Conservative politics is based on delaying economic shortcomings by robbing Peter to pay Paul. Another example of which is over-paying for roads and only 5% of your hard earned taxes going to road building and repairs. That is why we have so many potholes: hence, pothole politics. The evidence for which on on the streets and highways in your area. In Sussex the busy A271, makes commuting to Hastings or Hailsham dangerous, where the tarmac is narrow and flooding is likely to increase. Why is it so bad? Because under Cameron, May and now BoJo, they are turning our villages into housing estates, without the proper highways infrastructure. See Suicide Junction, as a prime example of planning madness.
DOWNRIGHT DANGEROUS - We pay our taxes but get no value for all our hard earned pounds. Don't forget that our income is taxed along with just about everything we buy. Even buying a house is subject to stamp duty and dying also costs money with death duties. Shit! How are they getting away with bleeding the electorate dry like this? Fuel is taxed, drinks are taxed (that's okay by us), and using roads is taxed. Then there is car tax of course. We heard they are thinking of taxing sex, based on the length of your Johnson.
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