WHEN THE SHIT HITS THE FAN

 

  NEVER GO ROWING UP A SMELLY RIVER WITHOUT A GOOD SET OF OARS, OR YOU'LL END UP IN THE SHIT

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When "the shit hits the fan," it means that you have been found out for lying, stealing, fraud, or your council has been conducting an institutionalised vendetta and you have (rather stupidly) gone along with it. 

 

The revelations may take what is one solid mass of shit, and spread it around all of those who were responsible for making that situation happen. Ultimately, corruption is the fault of the law makers and the Head of State, for allowing such situations to arise, without an early, hence effective remedy. And then doing nothing to restore justice or give just satisfation.

 

The shit may have have been said to have hit the fan in these examples:

 

Bojo being caught out lying about Partygate, or Britain being the most corrupt country in the world when it comes to laundering drug money. Then there is the UK economy. SHIT! Or, global warming and plastic killing wildlife in our oceans. Maybe, where you are there is no water to drink. Or, your island might be flooding, leaving you homeless. Or a family member may be accused of rape, making you look bad. Or, you may have lied to parliament and invaded Iraq and been found out.

 

Then: THE SHIT HAS HIT THE FAN.

 

 

 

Tony Blair up shit creek without a paddle

 

 

Tony Blair KG, invaded Iraq on false intelligence, and was Knighted for being a war criminal. The honours system appears to reward liars and cheats for keeping Mum. He should have been reported to the ICC, under the Genocide Convention.

 

 

 

 

On this page we will include some helpful ways to make you feel better, after you have been found out - and the shit is now flying in all directions. We may publish more ways of dealing with flying shit - as we find them.

10 WAYS TO MAKE YOU FEEL LESS SHITTY

1. PUT IT ON PAPER

Journal, write, record the inner thinking and talking. This seems to work. writing about shit makes you less constipated - or FEEL very much better, in real or worry terms. Sharing a problem, halves it. So, we feel great. 

2. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE

Hang out with awesome, uplifting, positive people. Or call someone who is positive, like actually pick up the phone and talk to them. Call your Mum of Dad. You may burst into tears after a few minutes of talking - but you'll feel like a new person. Like the grey fog around you is lifted. You'll always feel less shit if you cry. Let your emotions flow.

3. PRACTICE GRATITUDE

This will help you in so many ways, as soon as you start you’ll begin to realise all the magic that is actually in your life. That this sucky moment might be there for a reason. Don’t wait for sucky moments to think about gratitude. Practise. Every. Single. Day. Gratitude is a game changer. Look back at what you have achieved in photo albums or all around you. Be grateful for what you have. Others, are less fortunate.

4. CREATE SOMETHING

Paint, play your musical instrument, draw, write, cook, bake. Do something you love, create something for fun and if the only thing it does is pull you out of a bad mood, it’s a success! And who knows what else it could lead to. If you want to learn more about why creating stuff leads to happiness checkout Dan Norris’ new book Create or Hate. It’s epic!

5. GET MOVING

Exercise, you are not meant to be stationary. You are meant to move and not just from your chair to the kitchen, to the bathroom a couple of times every day. If you’ve been putting off a regular exercise regime… now is the time to start. Find something you love to do. Walk, dance, pilates, yoga, surf. It’ not just about slugging away in the gym. Have fun and you’ll be more motivated to do it. Exercise literally gets the juices flowing for the body, mind and spirit.

6. GO FOR A WALK

Walk outside, sit on the beach, lay on the grass. Go barefoot, get grounded, soak up some vitamin D. Change your environment and your energy and thoughts will change. 

7. HUG & HOLD HANDS, OR IF YOU HAVE A PARTNER; CUDDLE

There’s something powerful to human touch, I googled it and human touch releases oxytocin and serotonin into our bodies, lowering heart rates and cortisol levels and this makes us happier. Epic, get cuddling! If you don't have a partner, get a sex companion: Fembot - Manbot. They should be available on the NHS.

8. LISTEN TO MUSIC & HAVE A DANCE BREAK

Have you forgotten how fun music is? Put on your fave song right now and see what happens. Get moving at the same time and dance like a crazy person for extra happy vibes and that is a guaranteed farewell to shit feeling. We asked a bunch of people what their fave high vibe songs are and we now have a go-to list. Watch this space, we’ll write about this and create an awesome list for you! We have a dance break at least twice a week!

9. TAKE A NAP OR A LITTLE REST

Many crappy feelings come from not enough sleep. Sleep deprivation. If you feel tired, angry and nothing is going your way - stop trying to push through and have a lay down. Also, try get enough sleep every night. What’s your optimal sleep time? 6 hours? 8 hours? Find out and do it.

10. DO SOMETHING GOOD FOR SOMEBODY ELSE

Sometimes bad moods make you selfish, you start thinking you’re the only one hard done by. Realise that someone out there would be so freaking grateful to have just half of what you have right now. Get out of your head and do something good for somebody else. Yu will feel great, and they will benefit from your experience. 

 

 

 

 

 

WHAT IS A SHIT CREEK?

 

A creek is a small stream or a narrow, sheltered waterway, especially an inlet in a shoreline or channel in a marsh. "A sandy beach in a sheltered creek. An insurmountable problem without a remedy, is a shit creek"

 

WHEN ARE YOU IN THE SHIT?

 

You are in the shit, when you cannot find a way out of trouble.

 

 

 

 

     

 

 

ARE THEY SURE? - Southern Water say these are essential improvements. But are they? Many concerned residents are of the opinion that the village was already overloaded. Meaning that these works are more profiteering from over-development of the countryside. It's hot enough already without raising the temperature of planet earth more!

 

 

 

 

 

LINKS & REFERENCE

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_feces

https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/shit-creek
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schitt%27s_Creek
https://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Shit_Creek

 

 

 

 

 

 

MAY 2020 - Southern Water getting stuck into their shit pumping station in Herstmonceux, Sussex. Never mind water neutrality, and climate change. In the background you can see the windmill @ Windmill Hill, a listed monument to a sustainable age.

 

 

 

 

 

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